Shamira: Love is Hard

Story Title: Love is Hard

Story Link: http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/23405/love-is-hard-eunhyuk-superjunior-you

Author:  Shamira

Profile Link:

Reviewer: daniela501

Site: Sweet Delights Request Shop

Title 5/5

I think the title perfectly fits the story since they were through much hardships ever since their past relationships.

Foreword/Description 7/10

Foreword given wasn’t really a foreword and the description wasn’t detailed.

Originality (Plot and Character Personalities) 13/15

Plot wasn’t that original, but it’s good that you gave Eunhyuk a different personality.

Flow 7/10

Things were going so fast, like their relationship. They became friends instantly when they were like enemies at first and their wasn’t a significant event to make them reconcile.

Writing Style 19/20

Understandable and it’s clear who is speaking.

Grammar 10/25

I found rather a lot of grammatical errors just in the beginning, that’s why a lot of points have been deducted.

I would have given you every error so you can edit them all without having to look for them by yourself, but review requests are still lined up.

So here are some of the errors I found.

Eunhyuk is the most best dancer in the school , I mean , Yeah for the boys . He's the most famous guy in school .

Revision: Eunhyuk is the best dancer in the school, I mean, yeah, for the boys, he’s the most famous.

You like to help everybody that in deed in your help but they like to make fun of you just because you are a nerd . but , You don't wear spectacles .

Revision: You like helping people who are in need of your help, but they like to make fun of you because to them, you are a nerd, despite the fact that you don’t wear glasses.

It's been a while , I haven't talk to you .

Revision: It’s been a while, I haven’t talked to you.

The competition is just tomorrow ? I think you better go practice

Revision: The competition is already tomorrow? I think you better go practice.

" If she is lucky , I think she won't get the affect but most of my patients , They got the affects " Doctor said .

Here are your major mistakes:

1. Spacing

-          You often put spaces even if unnecessary. DO NOT put spaces BEFORE punctuation marks. DO put spaces AFTER them

2. Capitalization

-          The first letter of a word should only be capitalized if: a) it is a proper noun, b) it comes after a period, and c) it is the first word of a COMPLETE sentence.

3. Forming the past tense of a word

-          Remember, you are narrating something that happened in the past, so you need to use the past tense of the verbs.

Overall Enjoyment 13/15

I enjoyed the story, but as I said, everything happened so fast so I wasn’t able to savor each moment.

Bonus Points 2

Total Score: 76/100

Reviewer’s Note:  I hope you are all right with my review ^^